


Poor Richard

by tamalinn



Series: Hexed Sex and Fonts [2]
Category: Smallville
Genre: Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-06-25
Updated: 2004-06-25
Packaged: 2017-11-01 07:51:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/353990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tamalinn/pseuds/tamalinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lex suffers after his afternoon with Clark.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Poor Richard

**Author's Note:**

> This is the sequel to Mountains and Molehills, so it won't make a lot of sense if you haven't read that. Big thanks to Amy and Madelyn for the betas, and to Kilronan for shocking my muse back to life. This story was begun before Visitor aired, so it veers off from canon. For Clari Clyde's Clex Typography Challenge. Feedback makes me dance naked on a table and buy drinks for the whole bar.
> 
> Disclaimer: If they were mine, Lex'd be getting more action.

Lex set his untouched drink down on the dresser, grabbed a sock and then sat down on his bed with his head in his hands. What the hell had just happened? Lex tried to go over the sequence of events in his head, but couldn't concentrate. He could still smell Clark's sweat and come and saliva all over him, and it was leaving him horny as fuck. Hell, he still had the erection to show for it. It was a tenacious little bugger. Hadn't gone down at all from Clark's sudden exit to Lex's journey around his office to gather his clothing through Lex's trip up the stairs to his bedroom. 

Lex figured he should deal with it and then wonder about Clark. Or call Clark and find out why he had left. 

Lex lay back on his bed and curled his hand around his cock. Clark had come on to him. He stroked. Hell, Clark had more than come on to him, Clark had thrown himself at him. He stroked harder. But Clark had left. Lex let go of his cock. 

No, he needed to ignore that Clark had left. His cock was pretty purple, and it couldn't be healthy for it to stay erect too long. He ran his fingers along the length. Why the hell had Clark left? Lex thought letting go of it. Clark didn't seem like the kind of guy who would leave without reciprocating a blow job. Of course Clark hadn't actually gotten a blow job. Not that that was Lex's fault. Lex was more than willing to give the blow job, Clark just hadn't lasted. 

Maybe that's why Clark had left? Maybe he was embarrassed? He thought perhaps should call Clark and let him know it was okay, it happened to lots of guys, all the time. Not that it had ever happened to Lex. Well, not in a long time, anyway. He reached for the phone. No, wait, Clark might not appreciate a call like that.. If Lex picked up a phone and heard, "It happens to lots of guys. In time you'll learn control," he'd probably throw the phone out the window. After he set it on fire. And then possibly take out a contract on the caller's life. 

Lex put the phone back down. 

Besides, at the moment, Lex had more important things to consider, like his erection that still hadn't seen any relief, and was most definitely completely purple. 

He obviously wasn't going to find any satisfaction stroking his cock to thoughts of Clark. What about Helen? Lex and Helen had been seeing each other for quite some time. She was very pretty and Lex was reasonably sure he had strong feelings for her. Oh _shit_! Lex realized. I'm marrying Helen and I almost sucked off _Clark_! What the hell was I thinking? 

Lex looked down at his very purple cock. "Oh, right," he said. "I wasn't thinking at all." 

The door opened. "Lex, are you in here?" Helen called into the room. 

* * *

As Helen stepped through the door, she caught sight of her boyfriend lying naked on their bed. Her breath caught. Lex was so beautiful, alabaster skin practically glowing even in the dim lighting of the room. He was sprawled out, legs slightly parted, arms out at his sides, cock so full it was almost touching his stomach. 

"Well, this is quite a 'Welcome home,' Lex," Helen husked. She swayed her hips lazily as she approached his prone figure. 

"How long have you been waiting for me?" she asked, reaching towards him and trailing a finger up his leg. "Thinking about me?" she continued, wrapping her hand around his cock. God, it was hot to touch. 

Lex sighed. 

Helen smiled. She loved his body. She loved touching him and making him feel good. Still slowly jacking his cock, Helen leaned in to kiss his reddening lips but a strange smell stopped her short. Is that...? She let go of Lex's cock. "Lex?" she asked. 

"Hm?" he asked back, sitting up and opening his eyes. 

"What's--" she sniffed at his mouth. "What's that smell?" 

Lex's eyes widened briefly. Then he smiled. "I was thinking about you earlier." Lex winked and smirked, lifting his hand and running his knuckles along her cheekbone. 

Helen twisted away from his hand. "And you came on your face?" she asked incredulously. 

"Helen," he said reaching for her cheek again. "You're an amazingly beautiful woman." He ran his thumb across her bottom lip. 

Helen's breathing sped up. 

"Sexy and smart," he murmured, breath warm across her ear. 

Helen's heartbeat picked up too, and her eyelids started to slip closed. Then she caught that smell again. Her eyes shot open and she wrenched away. "That doesn't smell like your come, Lex," she gritted out trying to ignore her body's reactions to Lex's touch, voice. 

"I drank a lot of coffee earlier," Lex said, pushing himself up from the bed. "Helen," he began, stalking towards her. 

He was naked and flushed and beautiful. Eyes heavy-lidded and shining... Oh, God, he was so hard, and _leaking_ and, like that, she realized. None of it was for her, and it never had been. Helen put her hand to her face. "Clark. Oh, shit, I can't believe I didn't see this before..." 

Lex winced. "Helen, why would you think--" he tried. 

Helen rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, Lex. I've seen the two of you together. The way he looks at you, and you look at him like..." she trailed off. "Lex, you're in love with that boy. Not me. I-- This?" She motioned between the two of them. "This is over. It obviously isn't what you really want. I'm-- I have to go." She looked around the room wildly, everywhere but at Lex. 

"Oh. Okay," Lex said. "I'll call the movers." 

* * *

Half an hour later, his pants were zipped, the movers were called and Helen was packing and crying in the bedroom. Lex sat in is office, leaning back in his chair and reflected that if he was still hard, he couldn't really be all that disappointed that Helen was leaving. "She wasn't that bad, you know," he said aloud to no one in particular. 

"Right, but I'm not Clark, so it doesn't really matter." 

Lex looked up, startled. Helen stood in the doorway, tears sliding down her cheeks. Lex wondered briefly whom she thought he was talking to. He decided to let it go. 

"I packed up some clothes I need. I'm leaving." She tried to smirk, but her expression twisted into something ugly. "I'm just," she faltered for a moment before meeting his eyes. "I'm going to go." And she turned and left. 

* * *

With Helen gone, Lex wandered around the house until he found himself back in what was once again his room. He fell back on his bed, one hand falling above his head, the other landing on his still-hard cock. Lex sighed with resignation and unzipped his pants, fished out his cock and curled his fingers around it. 

When the phone rang. 

Fuck! Lex thought, glaring daggers at the phone. The phone ignored him, and rang again, insistently. Lex sighed and rolled over to answer it. 

"Hello," he said wearily giving his cock a longing look. 

In the meantime, his cock was weeping pre-come. Lex honestly couldn't blame it for its current mood. 

"Lex?" It was Clark. "You sound tired. Is this a bad time?" 

"Not at all, Clark." Lex reached for his cock again, but stopped at a thought. "How are you feeling?" he asked warily. 

Excitement thrummed through the phone. "Lex, I feel _amazing_. So amazing, it's amazing. And I wanted, no, _needed_ to thank you again. This afternoon?" Clark's grin was audible. "It was wow. _So wow_. And, yeah, thanks." 

Lex grinned. "So, Clark," he dropped his voice to a lower register. "What are you wearing right now?" 

There was a long pause. Perhaps initiating phone sex with the person who'd ditched you after you attempted to suck him off wasn't the greatest idea. 

Lex was about to apologize, when he heard, "What are you talking about, Lex? I'm wearing the same thing as I was when I came over this afternoon." 

If Lex hadn't been holding the phone with one hand and his cock with the other he would've slapped his forehead. "Clark, work with me. You know, I didn't get off today. I'd like to." 

"Oh," Clark said. He sounded apologetic. "Um, what should I do? I could open my jeans. Is that good? Or, um..." 

"That's fine," Lex said, trying to keep the exasperation out of his voice. "Are you hard?" 

**"WHAT?!"**

That time Lex did slap his forehead, dropping the phone accidentally. He leaned over the side of the bed and picked it up off the floor. 

"Lex? You there?" he heard the tinny voice ask. 

"Yes, Clark, I'm here. Look, I don't want you to do anything you're uncomfortable with," Lex said rolling onto his back. 

"No, um, it's... it's okay. I was just surprised. Let's go." 

"You sure?" Lex raised an eyebrow even though Clark couldn't see it. 

"Yeah." 

Lex heard a rustle that sounded like Clark might be nodding. "Okay, Clark, are your jeans open? Tell me what you're doing. Tell me what you'd have me do if I were there right now." Lex trailed his fingers lightly up his cock in anticipation. 

"Um... I think you should kiss me," Clark said. 

"I'm kissing you, Clark," Lex began, lowering his voice. "On your soft, wet lips. I'm nipping at them, then the corner of your mouth. Licking a path to your jaw. Can you feel it?" 

"It... the phone?" Clark asked. 

Lex rolled his eyes. "Use your imagination." 

"Okay," Clark said. 

Lex closed his eyes and continued. "Your skin tastes so sweet. And it's so smooth and soft. I'm biting at your neck right now. Sucking on your pulse point." 

Clark moaned. 

"Take your shirt off," Lex ordered. 

He heard a bump that sounded like the phone being put down followed by a soft thwumph of fabric hitting a floor that sounded like Clark complying. 

Lex gave his cock a light squeeze and stroked once before the phone was picked back up. 

"Back." Clark sounded breathless. "No shirt. No jeans, boxers, nothing. Naked." 

Lex's breathing picked up at the words. "What do you want me to do, Clark?" he asked, voice husky with desire. 

"Pinch my nipples, Lex. B-bite them. Twist them. Bite-- bite my throat." 

"I am. Licking across your chest. Along your ribs, down your stomach. I like the way your muscles jump at my touch. Tell me." Lex gasped out, quickening his strokes. 

"I'm hard, Lex. You make me so hard. I was thinking about you and what we did today. You make me hot, Lex. You feel so good. Your hands are warm and solid. Your body is so strong. Your mouth is so good, wet and hot, on my mouth, on my jaw, on my neck... my nipples... my... my c-cock... God, Lex, Yes! Oh, Lex!" There was a gasp followed by panting and then breath slowing down. "Lex?" Clark asked sleepily. 

"Yeah," Lex sighed looking resignedly at his still hard cock. 

"Was good," Clark said. 

"You got off," Lex said. 

"Mm hm," Clark said. 

"That fast," Lex said pinching the bridge of his nose. He really hoped he was still going to get off tonight. 

"Mm hm," Clark said and yawned. "We can do you now." 

Lex heard fabric shifting. Clark was probably rolling over. Lex wrapped his fingers around his cock and stroked as he pictured Clark's muscles bunching and stretching with the motion of turning in his sheets. He thought about Clark's dark hair, how it was probably falling in his eyes while Lex listened to Clark's sleepy breathing. 

"Lex?" Clark asked. "Tell me what you want. I want to touch you. I want to feel your smooth ski--" Clark yawned loudly. "--in under my fingers. I could trace your muscles. The line o--" Sounded like Clark shifted again. "--of your abs... Lex..." 

"God, Clark, more," Lex whispered stroking faster. 

"Le--" Another yawn. "--ex, sleepy..." 

Lex's hand stilled. "Clark?" he asked. There was no answer, just soft puffs of breath into the receiver. "Clark?" Nothing. "Oh, fuck." Lex reached over to his nightstand and hung up the phone. He craned his neck at his cock which might have been glaring at him. 

Lex rubbed his eyes and looked back at his cock. It was a very angry red. "What do you want from me?" he shouted. Lex raised his eyebrows. "And why am I even talking to you?" he added, shaking his head. He fell back against his pillows with a muffled thump and yawned. Stretching his arms out to his sides, he promised his aching dick, "I'll make it up to you tomorrow. I swear." He reached down and gave his cock a squeeze then flicked his thumb over the head. His dick spit some pre-come at him. Lex rolled his eyes before closing them. He tossed and turned briefly before falling into an uneasy sleep. 

* * *

A dull throbbing woke Lex at 4:02 the following morning. He scowled at his clock, and then sat up and glared long and hard at his cock. "You couldn't just come in your sleep like any other guy's cock? You had to wake me? Well, fuck you," Lex spat crossing his arms over his chest insolently. His cock dripped on him. "Don't look at me like that. It's your choice to stay up this long." 

Lex's cock twitched painfully. 

"Fine!" Lex threw off the covers in a huff and marched to the bathroom as best he could with a metal rod between his legs. He turned on the shower and waited for the water to warm up. "You happy now?" he demanded, stepping into the spray. 

Lex slid the door shut and faced the water, feeling it trail down his skin. He followed the drop's paths with his eyes until they came to rest on his straining purple cock. Lex wrapped his hand around it and leaned back against the tiled wall beginning a rhythm of squeezes. 

He remembered Clark showing up at the mansion the day before, his loss of balance when he saw Lex's bare feet. Clark's face was a mixture of confused curiosity and heady desire. Lex smirked. His farm boy had a foot kink. Lex's cock squirted a little pre-come bringing Lex back to the task at hand. 

The memory of Clark's unpracticed nervous kisses made him smile. The heat and passion he'd felt on Clark's lips brought him deeper. Then there were Clark's strong muscles, so clearly defined and so smooth beneath Lex's fingers. He twisted his stroke and gasped, remembering Clark's radiating heat. The feeling of being chest to chest with him, Clark's hard nipples pressing into Lex's skin. The taste of Clark's skin, sweet and salty, as Lex mouthed Clark's throat. The light bite of Clark's teeth as Clark nibbled his. Lex gasped again. 

The water streamed down Lex's body. He imagined Clark's tongue tracing the lines of the water. How Clark's soft lips would feel on his nipples. He stroked his thumb across the head. On his stomach. Again. His cock. "F-- G-- 

"FUCK!" Lex shrieked as the water suddenly went freezing cold. 

He threw the door open throwing water everywhere and splashed out onto the bathmat. Rage burned in his cock and his eyes. "God Fucking Dammit!" he yelled, tearing a towel off the rack and whipping it around his body. "What's a guy got to do to get some fucking satisfaction? Fuck!" 

Not bothering to dry himself off, Lex threw the towel to the floor and stormed back into his room, flopping down on his bed, yelping as he crushed his dick, and then flipping over onto his back. 

Today was going to be a very long day. 

* * *

Lex stared at the ceiling fervently ignoring the ache between his legs. After an hour of counting cracks, he pushed himself off his bed, pulled on a shirt and struggled into some pants before walking, slowly, downstairs to his office. 

"Coffee," he said curtly into the intercom before opening up his email and reading the reports he'd skipped yesterday due to Clark's visit. 

The door to his office opened. "Your--" the maid stopped speaking, seeing the set of Lex's jaw. She instead just set the coffee down on his desk with a noisy clink and backed away. 

Lex looked up briefly as the maid scuttled out of the room. 

He took a slow sip of his coffee. Which seemed to inexplicably make his dick perk further. 

"What," he said, pissed off. "Caffeine affects you now? God damn it," he continued, as he tipped his coffee slowly over his cro-- "Wait. What am I doing? That's gonna fucking hurt!" Lex set his mug back down with a thump. Some coffee sloshed over the sides and onto his hand. "SHIT!" he yelled, shaking the hot coffee off his hand. 

Lex grumbled something unintelligible and looked at the time. 5:30 AM. Clark must be awake now, farm living and all. He could theoretically pop over there, bend Clark over a hay bale and fuck him. Lex's cock twitched valiantly at the thought, but then Lex remembered Jonathan Kent had a gun. And probably wouldn't appreciate Lex interrupting his son's chores to shove a cock up said son's ass regardless of the fact that Lex had been hard for about 12 hours now and it really was said son's fault and there was just no _way_ that was healthy. 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Lex asked his dick. "Wouldn't survival instincts of some kind dictate that you, I don't know, get soft at _some_ point?" Lex was beginning to worry he'd never find out. 

He needed a distraction. So Lex opened Solitaire and played until it was time for him to leave for work. 

* * *

Lex pulled up to the factory and got out of his car, reminding himself to keep his hands out of his pockets so as not to reveal his not-so-small problem. Thank goodness he preferred long jackets. 

He spent the day sitting behind his desk in rising discomfort, fidgeting and yelling and basically marking time until 3:30, when he could go find Clark at the Talon and finally, _finally_ get this taken care of. 

* * *

At 3:30, Lex awkwardly scuttled out of the office and to his car and roared off, pulling up in front of the Talon at 3:35. 

Clark was sitting in the corner, at what Lex liked to think of as "their" table. As Lex approached him, he started planning. Asking Clark to accompany him into the office and then bending him over the desk. No, taking him on the floor. No, up against the wall. No-- 

At that moment, Clark looked up through his lashes and caught sight of him. He smiled brilliantly, and Lex let out a loud groan as his cock chose that absolutely inopportune moment to raise a white flag and soak his pants. 

All eyes in the Talon turned towards him as he slumped against the nearest table, and tried to catch his breath. Clark, of course, jumped up from the table and came rushing over, a look of concern on his face. 

"Lex," he said, wide-eyed, "You okay?" He rubbed his hands up and down Lex's arms. 

"Yeah, fine," Lex panted. He grimaced at the tackiness in his pants. "Honestly, this is the best I've felt in about twenty-four hours." 

"Lex," Clark said, lowering his voice, "I was thinking. Um. About last night. I feel bad. And I can, y'know, help you out. If you're still, um. _Up_ for it." He turned bright red as he looked at Lex. 

"Actually, Clark," Lex said, straightening up and brushing the wrinkles from his coat, "I'm all good now." 


End file.
